To persevere with someone who makes you want to walk away

Sometimes we look around only to discover that we are still struggling with the same issue, same person, conflict, addiction…sometimes in relationships we find that the sins and struggles of another bears down on us to the point where we don’t care to have the heart to carry on. It has become exhausting and wearying. It would be so much easier to walk away. Dealing with women who have spouses that struggle (or when the wife is struggling) has been revealing of all the sorrow that people carry when someone close to them is in bondage to sin. There is no way around it – sin is ugly, it destroys, it wounds, it has consequences. It is especially difficult when you are married to someone who seems to be bent on destruction. How does one persevere in...

Your reward is coming.

How great, good and glorious when you come through the season of sorrow, How beautiful you are when you emerge from the fiery time of testing. How much more you radiate the power and sufficiency of Christ. Well done, good and faithful servant. You did not bend to the world. You did not crumble in defeat. You stood your ground, you stood on the promises of God. Though you did not see any evidence of God working, or evidence of His strength…it was there, He was there. The principalities of darkness, the enemy of God has witnessed your love, your steadfast faith in what you could not see. You did not falter, you did not give up. Great is your reward, precious child of the King, great is your reward. Isaiah 60:1-3 NKJV Arise, shine; for your light has come! ...

Taking time to allow delights of your heart.

Clean bed sheets. They make me happy, so does taking a walk, having a good cup of French vanilla coffee on the back porch, watching the baby goats run through the lush, green pasture, a full moon, buttery popcorn, fresh cut flowers…so many ways to have a moment of bliss and mostly, they are free – if I will only partake. Those unique ways, fused into my day help me to reflect and remember the joys of life. Where did we get the notion that God wants us walking around with long faces, sober thoughts and a life of want and neglect? God wants us to enjoy life – not to the point where we make this world our desire, but to recognize that He gave each of us wonderfully unique ways that speak “smiles” to us. For me, it is a lot of being...

How you can play a negative role in your marriage when he struggles.

Being willing to look at how your own attitude, action, perspective and yes, sin has helped to place stress on your marriage goes a long way. Keeping your own heart pliable, being willing to acknowledge that you have a part in this too says a lot to your husband. For one thing, it can bring him out of the corner that he’s felt backed into. Too many times, we women can say we do things that hinder, but we aren’t so willing to have them pointed out. I understand how easy that is. I was once the queen of “His issues and problems are THE problem!”   David .C. Dominici Recognize that there is a lot going on in a relationship between a man and woman: personality differences love language – what’s important to us in the...

No More Shame!

Walking alongside women, I’ve dealt with everything from addictions, distractions, God’s plan for marriage, submission, intimacy/sex, communication, fear, control as well as many other issues/topics. The one place I find necessary to return to is shame and intimacy. Shame invades our moments of nakedness in the marriage bed. Misconceptions regarding intimacy keep us from enjoying the pleasure that God meant for a husband and wife to share. Shame whispers that we aren’t good enough, not deserving and can even tell us that we do deserve to be treated wrongly by others. Shame tells us to hide. Shame can cause us to live in the fear of being found out. Shame wants to shut others out. Shame thwarts intimacy and relationships. Shame and the...

Overwhelmed? Let me hang some things up for you.

Allow me to hang up some things for you…a little more than just taking your coat and purse as you walk through my door.  Allow me to give you back some time and sanity if I may… You aren’t meant to do it all. Celebrities may look like they have it all together, look perfectly put together and have adorable little play-dates with other celebrities kids, but the truth is…and you probably know this…they have people – who help, take care of, cook, clean, nanny, apply make-up, choose wardrobe, run errands, pay their bills, etc. The simple task of just looking as good as you possibly can for any extended time, is exhausting and all-consuming. It’s a fairy tale, not reality and not even possible. I lived through two weeks of...

Feelings of defeat and failure.

Sometimes, you get overwhelmed, you feel far from truth, like your emotions are in control and they are bent on sending you over an emotional-melt-down-cliff. You know you are meant to be truth-centered, but sometimes, those “feelings” seem to take the wheel. It seems as if nothing makes sense and a lot seems out of control. For a moment, you feel like a complete failure. For a moment you feel utter defeat. The lies and whispers of the enemy dance in your head, only it maybe it isn’t the enemy…maybe its the truth…you don’t measure up, no one care, who do you think you are anyway… Take a deep breath. This is normal. Though for a moment it can seem as if all sense has left your brain and you feel like the biggest failure,...

May friendship, encouragement and grace abound!