When fear takes over

The majority of time in my early years of marriage, I reacted rather than responding. My behavior, often cold and accusatory was rooted in fear.  As I began to align my life with God’s, I recognized how much fear had controlled my actions.  As I was nagging my husband about how he needed to change and lead his family, deep down it was really the fear that my circumstance might not ever change. I wasn’t trusting God to change my husband. I placed more leverage on my husband’s actions and attitude than God’s ability to change his heart. A fearful heart has great difficulty being an obedient heart.  God’s word speaks to His children to remain in obedience. In I Peter 3:6 he specifically instructs women to be like Sarah, who obeyed Abraham...

Connected but not belonging

Standing in a river and dying of thirst…or being constantly “connected,” but never engaging and having a sense of belonging. Our conversations have dwindled down to facebook feeds, tweets, texts…condensed, quick, briefly skimming the top with out taking the time to dredge into the depths. I had some time on my hands this afternoon. Actually, I chose that time. I stepped out of my office, chose not to do some dishes, fold some clothes, do some writing or organizing or planning…I stepped out of everything and went to the quiet refuge of  the wrap-around porch that is in the back of the house. Every one was either gone or napping. I didn’t even take my Bible or paper, or pen…or phone. I needed to talk, engage, to dredge...

Your voice is a megaphone about something

Ever thought that maybe the “greats” have it all together and that’s why God uses them? Though John Piper is one of my favorite teachers of the Word, Joni Eareckson Tada inspires me, Crawford Loritts always seems to hit that 2×4 spot in my brain, Billy Graham has spoken the Gospel to hundreds of thousands during his life time.  All used by God, all human, all fall so short, all desperate for God’s sweet redemption through Christ. They are people who have been used by God and have been allowed a spiritual megaphone and the platform from which to proclaim truth. That doesn’t mean they don’t have problems, don’t struggle. Sometimes, we think that it is up to others to do the work  – those super spiritual people...

Do You Have a Plumb Line?

Last summer my oldest son who is a gifted wood-worker made the hens a new chicken coop. Jordan, like any other craftsman is precise.   He doesn’t just wing it and slap it together, hoping it will come together in the end. He measures, twice, so he can cut, once. He thinks and ponders, draws up plans and considers all the angles. He set to work in those sweltering July days. He had a task to accomplish. He had a vision for the completed project. And he used the right tools. He drew a plumb line so that he knew his angles, his cuts would be straight…he had something to go by, something established, straight and firm. What about you? What are you aligning your heart and life with? If its your emotions then you will be tossed and shifted with every...

My self-inflicted prison sentence in assuming

There were times I felt as if I had been handed a prison sentence and the harsh warden was my own husband. Over and over I asked forgiveness for my crime which I assumed was making a bad choice, marrying the man I had loved. I assumed that God as judge, had sentenced me to life with a man who, at that time was not capable of returning love. I assumed that God had turned his back on me. My life was a prison sentence and I was trapped, bringing three innocent victims along with me to cower in the corner of a darkened cell. That was my perspective of God and who I was to Him. I wrongly believed God was punishing me while I felt the real guilty one had gotten off without so much as a warning. God, I thought, had the keys to my cell door but He refused to unlock the...

The vice-grip of pressure

Ever feel like you are in a grip, a vice, where pressure is coming at you from all sides. You know that God is good. You know that His Words speak of His faithfulness…but what about the times when its hard, when you just seem squeezed…you fight that empty feeling of dread – what if your faith has come to a halt. “What if” questions race in your mind…is He who He says He is…has He left me…perhaps I am not His child. Sometimes, there are no answers to the hard things in life. But always, God is working for your good. He is always doing what is the most loving for you. Sometimes, that seems to not make sense. Why the pain, why the sorrow, why so many things that just seem to be against how we pray? God is still good....

Am I truly a failure?

Sometimes, all we see is our failures. We just can’t seem to get it together. We are overcome with the driving sense of inadequacy that can paralyze and shake our confidence to the point where we shut down – frozen with the fear of even more failure. When we are on a path that seems so treacherous, and honestly, at times, so very lonely we wonder, who is traveling here with me. Have I gotten so far off, so far away, have I missed the mark by so much that now I’m a thousand miles from where I should be? We look around and though we’ve tried, it seems like the best that can float to the top is something that is just going to sink again, What’s the point, why try, it’s no use, I can’t do it, I will only fail, maybe God...

May friendship, encouragement and grace abound!